Philadelphia Nanny Network, Newsletter, Page One

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U P D A T E

Volume 2 Issue 8 Page 2 of 2

Winter 2002

INA News

The INA Nanny of the Year Committee is taking nominations for the Nanny of the Year. The nanny need not be a super star, but someone who epitomizes the "role model" nanny. She takes her job and profession seriously, while carrying out her duties with grace and humor. In past years, the Nanny of the Year has had a variety of backgrounds and experiences. The nannies that are nominated are recognized at the Annual Conference in June.

This year The Philadelphia Nanny Network, Inc. will sponsor the winning nanny's air travel to the conference. Go to the web site for the International Nanny Association, www.nanny.org for more information.

Promoting Positives in a Young Child's Behavior

All parents and caregivers have experienced a pre-school aged child's less than desirable behavior. Those days where she wakes up the baby by talking in her outdoor voice, her room looks as if a cyclone hit it within moments of awakening from her nap, and she races around the house with every attempt to dress her. Then in the playgroup, she refuses to share and say goodbye. One is hard pressed to say anything positive about the child when faced with such behavior.

The reassuring news is that all children go through stages as they grow. These are usually temporary in nature in which their behavior is often called "naughty" or "difficult". Take comfort in the fact that child development experts say when a child is most unsettled; he is going through a growing stage where he is learning new abilities. This phase is followed by one of relative calm!

No mater how bad moments are during the day or week, try to remember other incidents that occurred where the child showed considerate and cooperative behavior. Your own positive attitude about the child has the greatest influence in creating the child's healthy self-image. It is important, therefore, to step back each day for a few moments to reflect upon your charges behavior and step forward to communicate the positive things that took place. If you say, "That was thoughtful of you to share your favorite book with Julie today," it has far greater meaning than telling her that she was a "good girl". It is important for a child to know when she has been helpful or contributing to the family.

Wendy Sachs, President

Friendship A friend is a person with whom you enjoy sharing time. It has been said, "The only way to have a friend is to be a friend." But teaching how to be a friend is more difficult than it seems. Take a few minutes each day to discuss the concepts and feelings of friendship. Incorporate these concepts when the opportunity presents itself in routine conversation.

A friend is a good listener.
A friend makes you smile.
A friend is helpful.
A friend shares.
A friend is someone who cares.
A friend can be a boy or a girl.
A friend likes you just the way you are.
A friend is proud of you.

Help the children in your care to learn about the concept of friendship through hands on experiences. It is vitally important that you structure the learning environment so that children are exposed to ideas of negotiating and cooperation. Cooperation does not come easy at any age, so give opportunity to practice this skill. Here are some activities that you can use to help children understand the meaning of friendship. These activities can be exercised during planned play dates, impromptu playground gatherings or during structured group classes.

Often other people can comment on something
noteworthy that you can share with your charges to reinforce behavior. When another nanny tells you that your charge was polite and said please and thank you, share this with her.

One of the most important things you can do to encourage positive behavior in your young child's life is to provide a set of realistic, age appropriate expectations for him to live by. Of equal importance, be clear and in agreement on your employer's ideas about limit setting. The child can then have consistent guidelines. The words and manner you use are important in giving the child a clear message as to what you mean to say. For example, "Clean up your room after you play" may be too vague. "Put the books and toys away where you found them when you are finished," may be clearer. Understand the child's capabilities, though, and accept them. Set limits accordingly.

Neither adults nor children can always do what is expected of them. A child needs to know her parents and nanny were young once and didn't always put toys away when asked. A child needs to know an adult is not perfect, just like a child is trying to do a better job. Sometimes you can work together to accomplish the same task, such as remembering to return the library book.

Keeping a record of the child's positive behavior in a special notebook, and sharing the record with him is one way of reinforcing the behaviors you would like to promote. Above all, communicate to the child what a terrific person he or she is!